I am having one of those afternoons where I need to get something off my chest, This is not to offend anyone its just my personal feelings and one of the struggles I am trying to overcome at the moment and I felt facebook is not the place to put it but I might do it here. I am going to write about something that can be quite personal but its something I deal with every day.
At 17 and 6 months I found out I was pregnant to my boyfriend Kurt who is 2 years older than me. He was a fantastic boyfriend and I loved him to bits and did have plans to marry him in the future as soon as I turned 18. I was grateful for a family and friends that did not judge our actions at the time... Kurt and I got married when I was 4 months pregnant. Found out we were expecting a little boy. We were pretty excited. Spencer was born a week overdue with no complications. We continued on with life as normal as possible. We had our 2nd baby 26 months later. and Now expecting our 3rd on the 1st July.
So there is a bit of a background who knows us well would of already known all that. Here is the next part on why I feel a bit to old at the moment. On the 13th May I will be turning 22. Don't get me wrong I don't regret any of my actions that I have done to this day. Being 22 and having there very last baby is an odd feeling. I am currently under going counseling for a completely different issue but it came up last session and I was reminded that I am living a life of a 30 year old.
Somedays it does feel like I am 30 and not turning 22. Somedays I feel that I am way older than my friends because they may have just got married but I have 2 and a half other kids to think about. Somedays I feel that I am to young for this. There is negatives to being a young mum (cant stand the phrase teenage mum) but I think if you look at the postives they end up winning.
Although we are like any other new married couple. We are broke uni students, we pay rent we pay our bills the only difference is we have 2 and a half kids. We may live in the crappiest part of Queensland. In the worst street in Caboolture. But it's what we sacrifice to gain the rewards in the end.
Me at 17, When I was a size 6... Ahh those were the days.
Wedding Day.
Pregnant With Spencer.... All those experiences I won't change for a billon years.
2 comments:
While I wasnt 18 when I had my first I kind of get what you mean. Nearly all my friends were single or married with no kids travelling and being free to do what they liked and i was 21 with a baby ( and poor!). I now sometimes look back wish I had travelled or stayed single a little longer....but really I wouldnt change anything. I may not have done a lot of stuff but I love having a family young and I can travel when the kids are older and any other stuff I missed out on being "free" I probably shouldnt have been doing anyway :) You have a gorgeous family Ashlee !
Hey Ash, It's Cassie Watene (Watson). I wasn't quite as young but I still get what you mean, I was 19 when I got married, baby at 21 and now I have a little 1 year old! I am the only girl out of my friend group at school that is married let alone a baby! They're all travelling and living up life! But Callie is the best part of my life and I wouldn't have it any other way! Just sometimes we feel a little older then what we are! At least you'll be able to be still young when your kids are grown! :) good luck with Bub number three! we're trying for number 2!
Love Cas xo
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