Monday, September 19, 2011
Friday, September 16, 2011
So tonight I am a little bored and lonely, I am on my laptop and I can't view pictures properly so I thought I would randomly choose one and see if I can remember what it is about.
So the story behind this one is this is Spencer at 3 months old (Emily's age right now) and he was about to go for his first swim at the swimming pool. He has always loved water from this moment.
1. I love you because you never shut up
2. You are always into everything
3. You love food
4. You can not get enough of chocolate and strawberries
5. You love Spencer and Emily
6. You love necklaces and bracelets
7. You love In the Night Garden
8. Your favourite person is Poppy
9. You love to jump off the couch and hurt yourself
10. I love you because you came into our family and make every day happy!
Friday, September 9, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
So I know a lot of you that read my blog are on my Facebook so its like seeing a lot of the pictures twice. I am just going to over the funereal as I think I would like to record some of my feelings about it, As I treat this like a journal type of thing. I don't really care who reads it but I like to have my feelings out there rather than bottled up.
The feelings I felt on Tuesday was a mix of happiness and sadness. As I walked into the chapel and saw the coffin laying there I felt awful, I broke down and cried at the coffin. I was the only person in there. I was able to stand there for a few minutes looking and my dads choice of coffins and think wow this is gorgeous, It really suits Mum. As the slideshow came up that I put together there was not a dry eye in that chapel everyone was crying. I felt the spirit so strongly off it. We had our Bishop conduct the service where he said some amazing things about my Mum. Sister Linda Williams spoke about my Mum as a young Mum and how much she admired her. Than Bob my Dad's best friend spoke, he spoke saying so many things about her. How she was able to put up with my Father and able to look after us kids. We concluded that part of the service and it was time to go to the burial sight. Where my Mummy was laid to rest. I did not watch the coffin go down because I knew I did not have the strength to do so. My amazing husband shielded me as it went down, While Amazing Grace was played. Everyone yet again was crying. Once the service had concluded We headed back to the gilkes house for fun and enjoyment which was fun. After that we had the chance to go and have a HUGE Family dinner to celebrate my Mum. She loved having big family dinners. Yesterday we had the chance to celebrate even more by taking 33 people to go to movie world. Which was an amazing day. I could feel that my Mum was with us spiritually. She was an amazing woman and I love her so much and miss her a lot.
On the 30th December my Mum suffered from a seizure that would change each of our lives. A month after that she was told she only had 6 months to 18 months to live. On the 30th August exactly 8 months after we found out, My gorgeous mother returned to be in the presence of our Heavenly Father. Last Sunday I had the chance to bear my testimony and give thanks to her and how blessed I was to be her daughter. People keep asking me how I am doing and I answer I doing okay. I know my Mum is safe and I know she is happy. I had a brilliant relationship with my Mum and I am comforted to know that I will see her again. I use to have a huge fear of loosing someone close to me like my husband or my parents and with what was spoken at the funereal on Tuesday. I know I feel comforted and that I am happy she is in no pain. I love you mummy.
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Emily has very special little feet, One her right foot she has excess skin between her 2nd last toe and her baby toe, When she was born her left foot was slightly deformed and her fore foot is slightly curved in. On Friday my little princess has to wear a cast for 4 weeks. I am glad when a friend of mine did the pictures of the kids she got one of Emily's special feet.
With Emily wearing a cast, We are only annoyed to bath her once a week and when we do bath her it is to wash the cast off as she will get a new one every week for 4 weeks. Lets hope and pray she isn't to unsettled for the next 4 weeks.
Monday, August 22, 2011
I think I have the worlds best husband at times he makes the most yummiest foods and since I have been eating healthier and exercising he is the best support. He eats whatever I eat to make it easier and he comes up with the most brilliant idea's for my sweet tooth. This is Weis Mango Sorbet with pineapple. He even weighs it all for me to make sure I am having the correct calories. This dessert came to 105 calories and really hit the sweet craving.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
Today we had to take our puter (as Kurt calls it) to the repair shop (Apple Store) as it has been having a few little problems. Like not waking up from being on stand by and the screen not turning but the power is still there. We have had our beautiful mac for just under 3 years in face we are 70 days before our apple care plan finishes up (If you buy a mac please get Apple Care because you never know when your computer may just decide to play up). So we took our computer wrapped in a blanket to the store. Our computer is used a lot a part of our every day life to play on facebook to blog and for Kurt's uni stuff. So it has very much become a member of the family. As we walked into the apple store we felt very sad. I made the comment to Kurt its like taking a pet to the vet, Where he did laugh at me and call me an idiot. While in the Apple store we learnt two things. Don't take Spencer in there as he will not want to leave and not to buy a new computer from there as when someone buys a mac they all cheer and clap on your way out. Also another thing is not to go in there without money because it just makes you sad. SO hopefully we will get our computer back in the next few days. Maybe a whole new one if we are lucky. (Thank goodness for the time machine hard drive thing that has over 2500 pictures on it and 3000 songs). We can't simply live without a computer (Well I can't) so we have my dads mini lappy to borrow. So THANKS DAD.
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
I get told daily that Matilda is just like me as a little girl, Both in looks and temperament. A lot of people will say poor child with the temperament. Because I will admit to you now I was a feral child. I know a lot of the times my parents loved me but liked me is another question... But as I remind a lot of people from my childhood that tell me I was a feral child... I GREW UP, I am no longer a 10 year old that is trying every trick under the sun. I am married and I have 3 kids of my own, At lease with Tilda she also has a lot of qualities of her father's side of the family.
Like she LOVES her sleep.... For me I hated my sleep. She loves to sort things which is apparently off his side. Her favourite thing to do at the moment is to collect random things off the floor and put them in a bag and carry around the bag for hours taking things out putting new things in. I love watching her play she has side a huge imagination.
Tonight she is having trouble sleeping due to having her ears pierced today and watching her play and walk around singing just makes my heart melt the love I have for my gorgeous little princess.
Here are some pictures of our favourite game, She calls it cheese.
Playing PhotoBooth on the mac.
Monday, August 8, 2011
Well I was very proud of myself its the longest I have stuck to eating healthy and exercise and it has payed off. I am quite happy with my result thus far a loss of 3.1kgs and feeling great I am starting to fit into a size 12. Which makes me want to keep going. I have had a bad start to my week with coming back from Melbourne late on Saturday night. Which I might add I did so well while I was in Melbourne. I didn't really blow my calories but than coming back down from a high on Sunday and Monday, I was on the hunt for anything sugary possible. Today we are back on track. I have stuck to my calories but I am finding I am still quite hungry, I think it might be boredom. I went for a light walk this morning tonight I am planning on doing a more powerful exercise. I have 17.3kgs to go... Until I am happy with my weight. :)
On Saturday Kurt and I were so blessed to go to Melbourne and see my eldest brother James and his lovely girl Lael get married, It was an amazing experience and a true blessing. It was good to see my other siblings on the day too... It was such a happy occasion as it is the last change all of us will be together for my mother, Although the day was not about that it was a chance to see Lael and James get sealed.
Here are a few pictures that were captured from the day.
The stunning bride in her Cinderella dress
I have the best family in the world and being away from them is so hard sometimes. I truly do miss the support of my siblings. They are each wonderful and I am so grateful for them. Since Mum has been diagnosed with a brain tumour, I feel like no one cares that my family is big enough to support it's self but sometimes I feel I get forgotten about from people that say there my good friends. I know I will always have Kurt to lean on but other times I need someone to talk to besides a social worker or my husband. I actually want my friends to message me for once and ask how I am doing. Its not like I have been through this before.
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
While my 5 week old is fast asleep at 2:20am in the morning I am wide eyed a bushy tailed... WHY cant my brain turn off and let me sleep. Does my brain not know I have 3 kids to look after tomorrow by myself while my husband works hard to get a uni degree. I just wish at 2am in the morning they had better tv shows, rather than the Love Boat. I doubt old people are up this late. COME ON TV NETWORK put more good shows on rather than Home Shopping and The Love Boat.
I can't believe how much I love the pain I am in right now... It's a good feeling to have my muscles ache. As I power on doing my hours walk each day, I complain and sook to Kurt how much I am pushing it. I get home and think I my goodness that was an amazing workout, I feel fantastic as my stomach muscles are starting to form and Kurt & Dad are telling me I look GREAT. I am starting to feel good again, Although now I wish I could get the sleeping right. I guess one thing at a time.
Monday, August 1, 2011
I know I was 17 when this picture was taken but its on my wall at home as my goal... I hope to see this person within the next 3 months... Maybe not that skinny though. As my Mum use to tell me when I was 17 she was convinced I had an eating disorder... Kurt and I highly disagree because I was eating a lot but working my little butt off to look like that.
And to now.. Well this picture is about 18 months old and I was at my heaviest of the 84kg... I have chose to start loosing weight and to look good again to be active again. As I see all these weight loss commercials that they want to loose weight for there kids, Which I do but Kurt keeps reminding me that you want to loose weight for yourself because you want to feel good again.
Friday, July 15, 2011
The Sunday before Emily came was the most stressful today, There were a lot of nerves and feeling like I was going to vomit because of the nerves. I remember saying to Kurt why are we doing this again. Its not fair you go into the hospital pain free and you go out not being able to walk properly. The joys of having a caeser. So the Sunday we decided that we needed to finish Kurt's assignments and decided to have a bit of a family day. Night came I wasn't really able to eat much dinner because of nerves. We did the finishing touches of Kurts assignments and we went to bed around midnight. I could tell Kurt was starting to get nervous as he tossed and turned and I couldn't calm down either. So at 1am in the morning we decided that it was best for us to get up and watch the dvd we bought just in case we couldn't sleep. So at 2am in the morning we sat up watching The Foo Fighers Back and Forth. While Emily kicked away to the music I thought why didn't I do this sooner, This has really fixed my nerves. Finally at 3am in the morning we went to bed and fell straight to sleep.
The problem though was I had to be up at 5am to eat breakfast and to take tablets. So I only got 2 hours sleep. Luckily after I had something to eat I was able to fall back to sleep. Until 7:30am when I got up. Woke Kurt up and we were able to send off his assignment via email and were able to shower and relax for a bit before we dropped Spencer and Tilda off at Mum and Dad's.
At 11am we walked into Caboolture Hospital thinking holy crap when we come out of here we are going to have 3 kids! We walked up to maternity. Where I was greeted by my most favourite midwife John. (I highly recommend male midwifes) Who got me into my room and made me very comfortable. Although I was sad to find out he was not coming into surgery with me. After waiting for 2 hours it was finally our turn... I got wheeled up into surgery. Where the midwife got in trouble for not putting the rails up. I started to get really nervous again I started shivering and I told them that I was nervous. They made me feel really comfortable and I was starting to feel better. They wheeled me into the needles room where Kurt and I got to spend some more time together before they were ready to start putting in the spinal. Kurt was able to hold my hand as they put the drip in (I know not that scary). But than Kurt was ushered into the other room while he put in the spinal. Its the part I always regret the most. But this time it was not that bad. I always love the reassuring midwife. At about 2:15 we were ready to go.... They rugged me up and kept me warm.
As they started pulling and tugging at my parts, It was time for those famous words "Are you ready to meet your baby" Get the Camera ready! Finally we got to see this little chubby thing not as messy as Tilda was. SHE WAS FINALLY HERE. Little Emily Jayne Williams. Weighting 8.3 (Little Fatty).
There were a few little complications Emily came out blue due to the chord being wrapped around her neck. She also has a foot that turns in that might need surgery in the future. But other than that she is perfect.
When I found I was pregnant with Emily, We were shocked and couldn't believe it. It took a long time for us to actually be happy about being pregnant yet again. I felt that I was not capable about being the mother of 3 children under the age of 4. Also only being 22. We kept it a secret for as long as possible. So on the 30th December when my Mum had the seizure my whole families life had been changed forever. I was 14 weeks pregnant when I found out my Mum had a brain tumor I did not know how to cope nor did I know what to do. As time went on as I went along in my pregnancy I did not look forward to having this baby as I felt that time was escaping and that I didn't want time to escape because I loved my mum and it would mean less time with her.
My darling husband could see my grief and problem and came up with an idea to make my pregnancy more exciting. We decided that it was best to find out the sex and not tell anyone. My husband wanted to test me as, He knows I can't keep a secret from anyone especially my sisters. We decided the rules were that we would pretend that the guy doing the scan couldn't see the sex and that is the story we stuck to until Emily was born. We did not tell our doctor or our midwifes. We felt if we told one person we would want to tell more.
The Middle part of my pregnancy went really well. There were no really big hiccups. I started going to counselling to help me deal with the pre-mourning and there were no major problems. Besides from having ligament issues and Emily not moving as much as she should of at one point.
The final weeks
The Final weeks were the toughest part of the pregnancy. I had an increase in Braxton hicks and felt that she was not moving as much as she should be. I was just been told to rest and keep my feet up. When I hit 37 weeks was the hardest I have ever had it, One night after spending the day with my mother and the night out with friends I started having intense contractions where they were 8 minutes apart. I decided to ring the hospital and Kurt and I raced in there thinking oh crap what is this little baby doing. After 8 hours of being on machines it was decided that I was going to have this baby at 37 weeks. We were told by 6pm I will be going into surgery and that it should be out. Well 7pm rocked around and I was told that the doctor said if the pain is intense I can have something for it. Thinking they were going to give me some panadol. WELL I was wrong. The stupid midwife gave me pethadine. an hour later everything had stopped and the doctor said well if its all stopped they are not taking the baby out tonight but they wanted to monitor me just in case it all started again. So I spent a night in hospital. I have never ever cried so much in my life, You would of thought I had lost the baby with how much I cried. But she stayed in there for another 10 days and she finally came out on the 27th June.
So, I sometimes find it hard to find the time to blog. With the third born now I should be able to get more time to blog. I hope. I am going to try and be a better blogger. I thought about going private yet again but have decided I really dont care if people take the time to read my rambles as sometimes its the best I can do to get things off my chest.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
1. Waiting is now officially annoying me. Its not about the last month its the freaking last week. It just drags.
2. Only noticed this morning I have noticed that my wedding ring is no longer fitting my finger and digging it. I can get it off but its annoying to wear.
3. Lack of sleep, I have never had a problem with sleeping when I was pregnant with the other two, but this baby I can go to bed at 10pm and be up at 4am.
4. Nothing fits... I am at the stage where no matter what I wear my stomach hangs out.
5. My ribs hurt, Because the it's still kicking fairly high.
6. I don't like to be touched at all by my kids or my husband. Which is highly annoying because I want to cuddle all three of them but it feels like I have no space. I think that might be one of my problems with not sleeping as Kurt likes to cuddle in while he sleeps.
7. My ears are driving me mad... I always get itchy inner ears when I am pregnant (something to do with my liver).
8. I can't do anything at the moment.
9. My house is a mess.
10. I am SO sore!
There is my complaint session of being 38 weeks and 5 days pregnant!
Monday, June 20, 2011
Kurt and I refuse to take the kids to the Ekka when its on, So we thought it would be a good idea to have a family day out (including My Parents, My Aunty and My Brother) and we went and hit the caboolture show. It was a pretty good day. We got out early and were home by 2pm. We had heads of fun Spencer and Matilda went on heaps of ride. Sadly I forgot my camera (Which has been a habit lately) So the pictures are off Kurt's phone.
I think Spencer must of thought we weren't taking that many pictures of him lately and thought it was about time he started taking pictures of himself on Kurt's iphone. Here is some using the CamWow App. Some had Kurt and I laughing forever. Although I think Kurt was grateful to sync his phone up to the computer and get 60 pictures off his phone.
Friday, June 3, 2011
As I mentioned below some not nice person decided to back into our nice hire car last Thursday night. We hope the person that did the hit and run gets caught as people that do hit and runs are just idiots. We couldn't even open Matilda's door. We were so annoyed! Just glad I reduced the excess to $300 dollars instead of it being $1000's
On the 2nd day we were in Melbourne we had the chance to meet my brother and his wife's dog. I was a little worried at first about meeting the famous Hank. But found him a very loving dog. He was quiet and such a good boy. Matilda fell in love with him until he tried to steal her bottle and shoes. Soon she was running scared like Spencer was. But he is such a gentle big thing and so good around kids.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Last night we got back from a tiring trip of going to Melbourne for 5 days. It was awesome to catch up with the family and see our friends. Also the chance to celebrate the engagement of James and Lael. I have left my SD card in my Dad's laptop so we don't have any pictures. Although I actually didn't take that many. I guess I was just having to much fun to pull out the camera.
So this is what we did each day and the exciting events of it.
Thursday we arrived at 11:20 with Tiger and everything went smoothly until we had to book in and found that you had to book in 4 hours prior flying. Had to pay 30 dollars each flight. After arriving we went and looked around the shops. Got something to eat. We than went onto Melissa's to see them and the kids. The cousins had a lot of fun playing together. Plus arriving where we were staying we found out some tool decided to back into our HIRE car. Luckily I but the excess down to 300 dollars. Instead of costing us 1000's it only cost us 300 dollars in insurance and because the tool did not leave any note. We were stuck with the cost.
Friday we went down and saw Rob and Kim's new place and met Hank (there dog). We all fell in love with there house and Hank. We than went and did some shopping at Fountain Gate. Which where Kurt found 20 dollar jeans that actually fit his MASSIVE thighs. Plus meant new ugg boots for me as I could not find any I like up in QLD. We also got lost going to Robbie and Kim's. Which happened a lot through our trip and decided we needed a new GPS.
Saturday was the engagement party, We traveled down to Hayfield 2 hrs and 20 minutes away from where we were staying. It was a lovely day to catch up with family. Plus more of getting lost and screaming Tilda.
Sunday we had church, Getting ready for church we found out Matilda had an allergic reaction to something she had eaten and she broke out in hives. Running down to the local chemist to get some medicine quickly for her she was happy again. We than returned to Robbie and Kim's to have dinner and a game of poker (with fake chips). I believe they are still quite annoyed that I kick everyones butt. Also never really playing before they kept telling me I had beginners luck and we all agreed that we will have another game when we all get together next for the wedding. On sunday we were quite relieved not to get lost.
Monday was an early start was we had a early flight to catch. ALTHOUGH seeing this trip with problems each day. We thought how nice it would be to get home and relax and looked forward to warmish weather. We took the car back to budget and filled in some more paperwork. We had some breakfast and went to book into the tiger flight. At the tiger desk we were all booked in when the question was asked how far along I was I said somewhere between 33-34 weeks. They than requested a letter from my doctor stating I am that. So I rang my midwife in QLD and explained. She told me I was pushing it close but there shouldn't be a problem as I was 35 weeks and I was allowed to fly until 36 weeks. The letter came through tiger said No, I can't fly with them as the pilot did not feel safe as there rule states nothing over 35 weeks. Not even with a Dr cert. So with much arguing I end up giving up and deciding there airline is just plain stupid and booked onto a virgin blue flight at 2pm and Kurt and the kids were to leave on the tiger flight at 10:30. Well for one tiger is awful. Kurt was delayed until 1:30 and did not fly into QLD until 4:30. I was delayed an hour on my flight and did not get in until 5:30. It was an extremely long day with 2 tired kids. We did not get home until 7pm that night, We had worked out all up we had done at total of 12 hours of travelling. Which is almost as long as going to the USA.
Even though we had quite a few hiccups it was great to see my family and win at poker.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
It's been a while since our family has taken a holiday, Since Matilda was 6 weeks old. Tomorrow we are heading to Melbourne for 5 days. I am at the stage of I have clothes everywhere and can't be bothered to do anything besides since on my bottom and do nothing. Or sleep. Plus the suitcase is where I can't reach it and 2 scared to climb on a chair to get it. I use to LOVE packing for going away and now I can't stand it. Packing for 3 other people is such a pain. More than anything making sure my kids have enough winter clothes that they are covered from head to toe in warmth.
Let's hope for one we don't freeze and We have a safe flight.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
This year mother's day meant a lot to me, It made me glad I still have my mummy here with us. Over the last few months we have seen my mum suffer like she has not suffered before. 2 days after Christmas we found out she has a brain tumor and have watched her suffer in a way we dont like or we can't control. She has her ups and her downs and all of us hate watching her go through it. So it meant a lot to me this mother's day that I could spend time with her and talk to her. As I love her so much.
I think 2011 is the year for everyone to get married. Seriously the amount of weddings Kurt and I have been to in the last few months is crazy and the craze continues with another wedding on Saturday and than another one in August. Plus an engagement party in a week. This time we had the chance to see Rob and Jaime who have been our friends for a very long time finally tie the knot. It was an amazing ceremony with an amazing reception after. It was good to catch up with some good friends that we have not seen in a very long time.
We were also grateful for Spencer and Matilda's Nanna Susan to look after them. We also enjoyed coming back from the reception and watching the royal wedding with her. Matilda loved watching the royal wedding and pretty much cuddled into Kurt the whole time watching it. She is a true girl!
Thursday, May 5, 2011
At the moment I am currently 32-33 weeks pregnant. I am grateful to be able to carry this little baby and glad my body can keep up (just). At times like this week I have been SO frustrated. We do not know what the sex of the baby is which is really getting to me, Plus other hormones going on. I just want the next 7 weeks to hurry up as I want to see this baby SO badly. I want Spencer and Matilda to meet this little person. I dream about this baby, I feel really connected to him/her. But I don't know if I can last the 7 weeks. Although the B.H. get worse with the bigger I get. I just can't wait till the day I can hold my little precious baby in my arms.
Although we are not really ready for the baby to come because we have no nappies, no car seat (booster seat for Spencer). So maybe he/she can wait just a little bit longer.
Picture was taken when I was pregnant with Matilda.
Monday, April 18, 2011
I can't believe how much of this year has gone. With May approaching and being the 5th month is feels like it has gone to fast and I keep forgetting to blog everything that has been happening. The last 2 days of 2010 were one of the worst 2 days of my life. Than January hit and it got worse (most of you should know why and I don't think I need to go over it of a open blog). I thought I would never be happy again that this year is just going to be the worst year EVER! But since end of Feb things have been starting to get better.
This week we had the chance to see Lissy and her kids. Which has been a huge highlight of the year. I have not seen my biggest sister for over a year and felt very lucky to spend a week with her. Going to wet n wild and Seaworld (Got to love the fun passes). We had fun catching up and talking. Plus she has the 3 best entertainers for Spencer and Matilda. I don't know how Spence and Matillyda is going to cope without seeing there cousins. They will be missed. I guess the best part is in 6 weeks time we will be going to visit them.The 2nd best highlight ever. My brother James is marrying the most amazing girl ever! She is put the spark but into my brother and I am SO grateful for Lael. Not only she will be an amazing sister in law. But she is also an amazing aunty for Spencer and Tilda. We are so lucky that she gets to be a part of our family. They marry on the 6th Aug in the Melbourne Temple. YAY!
We are looking forward to the third highlight happening in less than 10 weeks. When I give birth to our precious little baby. I just wish I knew what it was. The closer it is getting the more annoyed I get at the fact that I have no idea what this baby is.... I don't like shopping for white, green or yellow clothes. I want to know now PINK OR BLUE!
I can't believ
With Spencer we have to have a lot of routine. Without routine we are in the day/night of hell. Starting with daycare he has to wear his runners. NOT his thongs. He has to have weet bix every morning with honey. At night time... 6:30 hits and its shower. 7:30 book and bed. He gets obsessed fairly easy. At the moment his BIG obsession is "Horton hear's a who". Seeing Kurt and I both grew up on those books. Kurt's dad got us some for Christmas to read to the kids. Something we can cherish as the kids get over... Sadly Spencer has started sleeping with the book and having it being read every night for the last month it is starting to fall a part. I guess the bright side of these things is we now know Horton hear's a who off by heart.
Matilda and her sweat stains... (it's just from her bottle)
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
After 6 months of deciding Kurt decided to update his mobile. He took forever choosing what would best suit him. Seeing he is a broke uni student. He didn't want to take the pludge and get what he really wanted. After one day and not being able to contact him because he was listening to his ipod on the train and couldn't hear his mobile. I told him he needs to get it as it will come in handy for uni plus it will make his an hour and a half train trips more fun. So he finally got one and I thought we would try out the camera.
Feeling so fat.... 24 weeks pregnant and not the best picture of my body.
Spencer taking a picture of himself.
A little princess, Who has her daddy wrapped around her little finger...